MCO 3.0 update and life lessons

 hello gorgeous people!!

im writing this at 8.46 am with about 4 hours of sleep in my system. i slept for a bit then woke up and had trouble falling back asleep again. i've been having trouble sleeping for the past weeks and today i think i know why. 

Earlier on i had thought that i was having too much screen time which is actually not good for assisting with falling asleep. I have been catching up with a lot movies since i just got a Disney+ account. there is much to update on the disney+ news but i think that would require a whole post on its own. coming up soon okay haha!

I have been having a lot of thoughts in my head especially at night when i'm trying to sleep. i mean i get a lot of thoughts too during the day but at least i can come up with an activity to distract me. phases like this happen a lot- when i constantly get overwhelmed by bad memories. 

today will be the day i get past that. previously the only way i dealt with the scary thoughts that keep me up was getting distracted. super early this morning around 6am, i thought of dealing with it through prayer. in the past when i would get paralyzed by bad memories, my mom was always close to me and i could just go to her and she would listen to me, hold me and give me the best advice in the world. now due to covid and travel restrictions i havent been able to be with her in more than half a year, 

Thankfully, i have the best boyfriend in the world and he is always trying his best to make me feel better and support me and protect me. he sticks by me when i get overwhelmed and i love him so much. at night though, im on my own. 

an idea that came to me today was that i can always pray about the bad thoughts, for healing over the bad memories. When painful memories flare up, they need to be healed and when you express that negative thoughts up to the Lord, it might get a little scary because you will think about it and feel all the traumatic emotions up on the surface again. dont be scared and surrender it to Him. I start with apologizing for not listening to His Word and that i need His help to be be more aware of my words actions to make sure i dont repeat any of my past mistakes. Then i pray for healing over the memory. Here was my prayer this morning:

Lord Jesus, I feel so ashamed for not obeying Your Word and I am overwhelmed with so much guilt and I dont know how to deal with it . Lord I ask for Your forgiveness Father. i know it is wrong to gossip and say negative words about people. Lord i know father that I should not have spoken rudely about my ex-manager nor should i have spread gossip about her ,that is not my place to speak about or judge. Father please help me to be more sensitive to Your Holy spirit. Lord help me remove anything in my life that is a barrier for me from listening to Your voice. Lord I need so much of You. Please help me to be more aware that my words and actions carry consequences. Lord I pray that the meditations of my heart and the words from my mouth will be pleasing to You. Lord you are my Rock and my Redeemer. Please forgive me Father. Amen!

my heart is calmer now that i have prayed this. the bad memories are actually from events that happened recently, almost 2 months ago when i befriended a person who was a very negative influence. Praise the Lord that i have cut ties with that toxic person. This is a prayer i found online to break any ties with a bad person:

Heavenly Father, you created us for a relationship. Lord, I meet and interact with different people each day, but not all of them have their hearts in the right place. Some people are agents of the enemy that is why I come to you, Father, asking you to help me discern godly souls from ungodly ones. Lord, I break evil soul ties with agents of the enemy that I have interacted with unknowingly. I renounce every covenant and agreement that I have made with these people, in the name of Jesus. I purify myself with the blood of Jesus and declare that I am completely free. In Jesus’ name, I believe and pray, Amen.

Hope this helps anyone out there! you can find more prayers here!

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I have matured from the experience. I am thankful to always have my family with me as i learn my way through life. I am Loved. 

day 3 malaysia quarantine

hello gorgeous people. i dont think ive ever done a post at midnight before so this is super exciting. im also using a super work laptop with gaming mouse so im fancy hehe. ive been keeping my eye close on the news as are many people recently. the covid 19 thing is super scary but not everyone understands just how scary it is. some people like to compare it with other diseases with higher death rates then say that their immunity will carry it through so they have no worries. like i get that dengue prolly infects more people but this virus is new, governments have no idea how to deal, its airborne and spreading hella fast and there's crazy symptoms that dont have standard treatments yet so please everyone just take precautions and be hygienic. its elementary that people should cover their faces when they cough or sneeze and people should also wash their hands often especially after touching a public surface. everyone just please dont be gross and keep clean. wear a mask.
malaysia just declared a movement control order, forcing everyone into quarantine for a fortnight but honeslty it may have been a bad idea. more people are travelling now since the issuing. it hasnt helped with the number of cases too. also right now im not sure if theres a ban on interstate travel or nah cause policies are seeming to be changing every moving minute. but if the decision that was bugging me a bunch was the one to stop e learning. yes, it doesnt make sense to cancel since its online anyway but i dont think its fair to have people worrying about grades while some have to think about their survival. also online systems are usually shaky. also uni classes suck, the education system is the worst plague on humanity.
anyways we're well into day 3 of the quarantine an ive been keeping myself entertained. on the first night me and my mantao had an origami date. we made cranes which my cat proceeded to eat. yesterday was the first night there was a police patrolling our housing area and it really scared it. theres now an imposed curfew of 8pm every night. we re super staying indoors. today mantao taught me mandarin and i like it so we 'll be keeping it up. tmr we'll be making a youtube video so you can stay tune for that. i want our cat to be featured in this so imma keep hopes up that she'll be back for breakfast tmr.
its getting late. see you later alligator

life update

hello georgeous people. its been a busy day today and i honestly would need to sleep for a month to catch up on lost sleep. 

i love myself and life in every aspect (other than the schooling aspect) has been really fantastic. i started an Instagram account for the cat that me and my mantao and are taking care of. her name s  Georgina and she is the cutest stray in the whole wide world. she s about a year old and her coat is white with grey and black patches. her collar is red and she hates it and always bites at it. she s also the hottie of the street and there is always some male cat out there trying to hump her. her instagram account is @littlegeorginapoo and she s got a fanbase building up. 

mantao and i met her when we first moved to the new room and on the first day, she jumped in through the window, from the balcony, into the room. thats where it all started. she kept coming back and soon we buying cat food and cat shampoo and bringing her out for playdates with other pedigree cats. she's our cat now and we love her and all her antics. we thought she was pregnant many times before but over time we discovered she was just fat. we wouldnt have her any other way 🐱

everyone else is doing super too! PTL! i have so much fun when im with the fam, my mantao and my cat. i love myself. 

its late and tomorrow is super long day so i need all the rest i can get. welcome March!! see you guys soon okay. laters aligator 💓💓💓

happy Valentine's Day 2020

hello gorgeous peopleeee!! happy belated valentine's day. i hope all of you get to spend a super special time with your loved ones this valentines. enjoy the flowers, the chocolates but most importantly, cherish the company and the memories.
yesterday i celebrated with a trip to taiping. it's kinda like ipoh just waayyy more under developed and with a lot more elderly people. we left for taiping a little bit behind schedule but the car ride was super fun and we went through a tunnel and had a super spotify playlist.
the drive was on a super spirally road and we passed long stretches of just mountains and hills. we reached taiping around lunchtime and we went straight to meet our friends and we all grabbed lunch together and i had a bowl of noodle soup. driving through taiping was really really stressful. it was like all the old people are driving with their eyes closed cause theyve given up on everything else. super butt clenching drive.
once we ate we went to WonderFarm Mushroom farm. mushrooms are not my favourite food ever and touching it is like touching wet sponge sometimes. but there are times where im in the mood for mushrooms like when my mom cooks it or when its in super small pieces that requires minimal chewing. but my mantao is super into mushrooms and he knows so much about them too.
one day he's going to have a mushroom farm and its going to be far superior than the one we toured on the taiping trip. i cant wait to see it! also during then i would have a lot more mushrooms in my diet but i'll like it.
then we went to an agropark. this agro park was relatively new but there was nothing much to see but maybe it was more of a night attraction cause it was too sunny to get any good pictures. one fun thing we got out of the agro park was, we got to feed koi fish and turtles and watch them squirm and worm in the pond. it was fun and it reminded me of when i was a kid and my parents would bring me and my sister out to a really fun park in ipoh, DR park. we would go have picnics there and when we had any bread left over, we would feed them to the fish in the pond there too. fish love their bread.
our last stop was a Spritzer eco park tour but it started raining by then so we couldnt walk around but the plus side was they have a cafe in there and we sat there just eating and chilling. there was a mini-golf golf course that we could see in a distance but we couldnt fully see everything cause of the rain. the food at the cafe was so-so but it was a fun hang out and the view in the rain was relaxing.
we left taiping at 6pm and there were horrible drivers on the road then too. there are too many heavy buses and trucks and motorcycles speeding around on the highway like theyre the only ones there. but thankfully we made it back safe and sound.
i hope all you guys had fun valentines experiences too. good night world. see you soon

Chinese new year 2020

Hullo gorgeous people! it is the eve of Chinese New Year and i am super exited for tonight. the fam has been planning a super hot pot dinner for a while now and its finally happening tonight. theres soup boiling now in the kitchen and we have so many of my favourite fish balls and veggies lined up. we reached ipoh yesterday around the evening and we did some spring cleaning too.
the house is super stacked with snacks and drinks and ive been eating so many of them. i like really cripsy stuff so all the deep fried fish snacks and nuts are really nice to have around. im also a huge fan of mandarin oranges and im super good at peeling them. if there were a contest for orange peeling i'd win it for sure.
since its a festive season, there hasnt been much to do out of the house. plenty of stores are closed and the malls are beyond crowded. sometimes shopping crowds get really rowdy too. plus, theres an influenza virus spreading, thats super dangerous. i do realise that in public a lot of people dont know the proper etiquette when it comes to coughing or sneezing so its best just to stay home. stay safe, everyone. i strongly recommend not leaving the house actually. home base is the safest.
ive been catching up on my rest and i didnt know how much i needed it. university life is tiring. with the extra time on my hands ive actually been reflecting on life. sometimes it gets a little scary so i try not to do it so much. it's a new year, im turning 22, super close to when people have that quarter life crisis. im already 2 years into my second decade and i have no idea how the time just passed me by.
i like to keep busy and channel all my energy into positive thoughts. ive been saying. 'i love myself' a lot cause i feel all giggly when i say it. it may sound a bit narcissistic but i think i'd rather love myself than hate myself (something i learned about from a netflix show actually). when i say it im also reminded of how blessed and how loved i am. ive even planned a surprise valentines gift for myself this year. i cant wait to do a valentines day post.

im super thankful for this laptop that mom and dad got me this year. its the coolest laptop ever and i get to watch netflix, play games, and write my blog post on it. it's been keeping me entertained a bunch. but i also have to use it for school stuff. and a lot of school stuff too since theres so many assignments and presentations to do. i really like gaming and i have a game in my head that im gonna target next. its called Overcooked and it seems really fun. i watched some streams and its so funny. i really wish i could do super cool streams too but i think i need a lot of fancy camera equipment. i used to like watching mukbangs and i wanted to stream mukbangs then when i watch gamers stream, i wanna stream myself playing games. the constant is that i really wanna try it. its a signnnn... i have to do it someday. i really miss making youtube videos actually. i promise i'll get back to making videos soon too. my pink camera is the cutest.
yesterday i had a super fun family lunch💓. i wish i made a youtube video from that. we had yee sang and really nice tea. i was really excited about that lunch. it was the first yee sang we had this year but i was excited for more reasons than that. its almost dinner and i should get ready.
see you later alligator.

happy 2020!!

hullooo you gorgeous people!! this will be my first post of the year 2020 so i'll be wishing yall a happy new year a little bit late. HAPPY NEW YEAR. 😇
2019 went by pretty quick but thats okay cause ill be looking positively forward toward the future. i didnt do much to celebrate the new year but i did have a sushi party and a pizza party and it was super. i didnt do a post for the whole month of December last year but that was because i was so intensely busy. i had finals and family stories happening. i wont talk about it much but i will say good news is that everyone's fine and healthy now👏. that month was a really big month of maturing for me. i had to study for finals, do so much traveling by train on my own and it was also the first time i drove to KL on the highway. i also had the least contact with family at this point. everyone was going through something so i had to take care of myself, my meals, making sure i eat veggies, stay hydrated and also financing all my groceries and travel costs. im thankful that i was able to be there for everyone as well as maintain my own health.

a new semester will start about a week from now and im looking forward to my new classes. this holiday has been a quiet one. i didnt go on any trips but im enjoying spending time with my mantao. im always going to remember how blessed i am to have him. driving me places, encouraging me when i feel like a potato and taking care of me when i dont feel well. this year was the first time in my life that i spent christmas on my own. i was sick with an ear infection and the antibiotics didnt help until the last dose. i felt cold, dizzy and i couldnt eat. when the headache was too much to bear, my mantao called at just the right moment and i felt better once we talked. the day after christmas he came to find me all the way from a trip he was on.

my safety 💓

right now my mantao and i are resting up as much as we can before the rush of the new sem kicks in. we're playing a bunch of computer games and ive come to like it maybe a bit too much. there are a few games that i wanna write so much about but i think i'll save that to make a whole post about it. i like cute, farming games and the one that im playing all day right now is Stardew Valley. it is the most fast paced farming game ever and its so much fun. i tried playing the mantao's favourite game, Overwatch, a couple nights back and there was so much yelling involved. it was fun to finally try it out but i dunno if i can play it on a regular basis. 

other than gaming we have also unofficially adopted 2 stray cats. these cats were hungry and they made too much noise around the house so we decided to feed them- George and Georgina. Georgina is actually a preggo cat so we're reading up on how to care for her and the kittens. we feed them twice a day and play with them when they start screeching for attention. there are more stary cats around and as much as we would like to feed them too, our resources are limited and we dont wanna make our cats jelly. 

i havent made any new years resolutions but i wanna make sure that this year i will pay more attention to my health. physical and mental health alike. also i promised someone that this year i would start tracking my finances haha. i will chose to move forward in the year with happiness and love. 

time to say goodnight. see you later alligator.

new asus vivobook laptop and big eyes

hello gorgeous people, I'm writing this blog from the mantao's computer again but i actually have a new laptop. Thanks to my super cool daddy who picked out the world's best laptop for me.💝 i just got my asus vivobook A412 last weekend and it's a classy grey clour that i love. for a long while, I had problems with getting my Microsoft office 2013 to work on my new laptop and i just got them resolved this morning. my office licence was a permanent one and i didn't know how to transfer them to my new laptop even after deleting it off my old laptop. this morning it all worked out and im so happy to have that finally resolved.
i love this laptop! it unlocks with a fingerprint sensor and its so lightweight. the frame around the screen is so slim so you get most out of the 14''. the keyboard lights up so it has that super cool gaming computer vibe but i turned that off for now cause i have it feeling itll drain my battery and i can see the keys just as well. the memory is pretty big so if i wanted to game itll totally work out for me. i actually have a few games already downloaded. one i really like is iron snout and its about a ninja pig fighting off blade-wielding wolves.\
so far ive been using the laptop for watching my netflix and the graphics are all super good and the sound too. i havent tried using the webcam yet but i will get that tested soon when i try streaming.
today i had a little bit of a late start cause i was just so exhausted that i only woke up when my mantao called me. we also went out to breakfast today and got noodles. its been a while since we had a breakfast date actually and i had a lot of fun💓
we did a bunch of chores too like getting food, changing a broken container and getting the car cleaned. im so thankful that mantao accompanies me on these errand trips because its sometimes a lot to deal with on my own with parking and carrying stuff in and out. he does get tired sometimes and i understand because hes been so busy with his schoolwork. im so blessed.
mantao s also not feeling well this week cause he has an eye infection. hes on antibiotics and getting better now and the swelling has gone down. his eyes were actually big and hurting a few weeks ago but it went off after he used some eyedrops. it came back and we got it checked. he will get better soon, in time for our super road trip to kl this weekend. its been a while since we ve done a trip and he deserves a fun, relaxing time for all his hard work and effort hes been putting into his mushroom thesis. i'll keep finding ways to do surprises for him cause i really like doing it💓💓💓im so excited. i need to get on pinterest nowww....
see you later alligator.