new car!

hello everyone!! guess what?! i am a princess... with a new car!! yes! we just got it yesterday and it is beautiful!! i love it so much. even though it's not mine, it's in the family and i am so excited!!
yesterday i got to eat ice cream at an ice cream parlor that i havent been to in ages. and the plan to go there was so spontaneous. we were driving back from a physio session and we just happened to pass by and we were like, 'lets go for ice cream!' yeah!!
yesterday i found out that you can get OFFICIAL seventeen merchandise on ebay too!! who knew?! anyways because i already bought the sad fakes, i cant get the real and nicer ones. im a bit saddened by it but i cant stop breathing because of it i just hope they understand. i cry sometimes when i think about their coming concert that i am not able to attend. i really really want to meet them in person. i think i'd sell my soul to get to meet them even just a glimpse. it's not a phase, not some passing hype or whatever old people label stuff, i genuinely find happiness in listening to them and when i forget to laugh, i am reminded when i watch their game shows. really that big a Carat.
but i cant.
now i decided to write on this thought i woke up to this morning. not what i had for breakfast( fried be hoon) but this statement: do not pray for a long life for yourself. if youre close to me, or happen to be reading this post then you would know that i have stared death in the face countless times, just never actually died. i always bragged that i was lucky but now im not sure.
i did a book review sometime last year on this book 'the storyteller' by jodu picoult. the storyline sorta vague to me right now but i remember some thing the old german nazi said to her after revealing his purpose of finding her. he said that long live is his punishment for killing all the jews he killed.
who was i in a past life? a grim reaper? why am i on the earth?
dont get me wrong. i am not depressed. i have so many reasons to be happy like my parents and the fact that i have so many people who like to read my blog which i just random thoughts i think about at random times. but one cant help but think about the purpose of life.
i am going to go through life with optimism which i see so much of in Seventeen.